“We’re pregnant!” First off, thank you! Second, it’s Katie, so don’t look at my belly and start making comments about how “you were suspecting”, or “I’m starting to show”.
Generally, as soon as we’ve made our announcement people want to know “how that whole thing worked”. The answer is that it’s a bizarre, sometimes frustrating, and often hilarious process.
I’ve always wanted children. I’ve spent so much of my life trying to be “normal” that I didn’t think about the fact that when it came to childbearing it would have to be different. I’ve already experienced many differences that I didn’t predict. Some that, as an ardent feminist, I’m embarrassed I didn’t see coming. Apparently, it takes more than a pair of ovaries to know everything about childbirth.
As much as Katie and I try to be equal in the process, due to the way the process goes, it’s hard to keep that sense of equality, even though I constantly eat supportive bowls of ice cream. Even though this is a really exciting moment in our lives, there are also constant reminders that I’m the Second Mother and as someone who has always really wanted to be a mom, that’s not the easiest realization to have. Part of this feeling comes from the unique situation of me being a woman who is “pregnant” but just isn’t pregnant, but it has also left me wondering if men sometimes feel this way too. I mean, I know none of them ever felt like they would carry a child in their womb, but there’s something special you know you’re being left out of. At least in my situation, if I’m not scarred by my front seat to childbirth, I get to carry the next one. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I might already know too much.